Mac & Ms. Mae’s

I have decided I will open up a restaurant.  Not just any restaurant.  No.  This will be the best restaurant.  A mom & pop feel.M&mM

We will specialize in wings and milkshakes.

If you didn’t immediately say F*#K YEAH,     I will repeat it.

We will specialize in wings and milkshakes.

Obviously, healthy dieting isn’t on the forefront of Mac & Ms. Mae’s.  We will have low fat options (and they will be tasty) but that will not be our specialty.  10 classic sauces.  10 award winning drop-to-your-knees-and-thank-the-Gods sauces.  Then there will be an exotic section.  I have spent some time traveling and before Mac & Ms. Mae’s opens I will do some more.  Sauces from around the world.  This will be a fun and daring section (example: a sauce whose primary components consist of a mixture of scorpion venoms).  Some people will of course be appalled and never try it.  Others will only come to experience this part.

Let’s not forget the milkshakes.  We will have our classic milkshakes (the secret is either Nutella or Homemade Peanut butter, depends on which one you get).  They will be a bit smoother than other milkshake places, no spoon necessary (it will say that on the menu).  Again, there will also be an Exotic Milkshakes From Around the World section.  This is sure to bring laughs to many.

On Sundays, I will have a pairing menu.  This is where I pair an exotic wing sauce with a specific milkshake.  It will be called Mac’s Specialty Mix.  For you see, I am Mac (NOTE:  a Mac Classic is the combo of Spicy Garlic Parm Wings with a Chocolate Milkshake.)  I take the responsibility of being Mac very seriously.  And the pairing won’t be random, it will be the culmination of months of testing.

There will be other specialty days and events that are sure to inject enthusiasm into the community.  Here’s a quick list of some staples you will be seeing every year.

  1. An annual Wing Eating Contest, all proceeds going to the Chase Majewski Testicular Cancer Foundation “Go Nuts 4 Nuts”.  Starts at 6 and goes ‘til midnight.
  2. Wings Day Wednesdays – 25 cent wings every Wednesday with the first Wednesday of every month only being 10 cent a wing.
  3. Freeze Your Face February.  The first weekend in February we will have a cookout in the bitter cold and serve free milkshakes, but only for patrons who sit on the patio.
  4. Happy Day Ms. Mae!  This will be celebrated twice a year.  First time on my Mother’s birthday (Feb. 21).  And the second on my wife’s birthday (TBD).  Each lovely lady will be given the year to prepare their own Ms. Mae’s Menu.
  5. St. Paddy’s day.  We will of course have alcoholic milkshakes 365 days out of the year, but on St. Paddy’s day we will make classic alcohol drinks, milkshake style.  Development is still working on a milkshaked Irish Car Bomb.

Mac & Ms. Mae’s will be a dream come true and a cornerstone to the community.  That is until I commit insurance fraud by burning it down.  Don’t worry about me though, by the time it’s all figured out I’ll be on a beach on the coast of Africa sharing a Mac Classic with whichever Olsen twin is still alive.BeachScene

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